This is also to extend a very hearty welcome to Magpie11 to the consortium whose post today is eagerly looked forward to by all the above four members.
As you proceed with reading this post you will come to know why I chose the topic. Happy reading.
Laurence Whistler, in a wonderful biography, ‘The Initials in the Heart’, wrote, when his wife died, that a friend, to comfort him in his misery, had told him that at some point he would “come through” it all. But Whistler didn’t find that idea remotely consoling. “What was unendurable,” he wrote, “was precisely the idea of ‘coming through’… If she faded altogether, I thought, that would be the real goodbye; whereas grieving, was only loving in another key.”
I believe that we cannot use any other word for ‘loving’ here! But in real life, we use ‘love’ in ways that convey different degrees of the intensity of that emotion.
Let me illustrate!
I love to blog/sms/surf the net/make phone calls.
I love my mobile phone. (The latest, not the one that was exchanged for the current one, though in its time, the previous one was loved too.)
I love my morning cup of tea.
I love Masala Dosa. (A very popular South Indian fast food)
I love Angelina Jolie/Brad Pitt.
I love to go to sleep.
I love all stray dogs.
I love my evening outings with my friends to the neighbourhood park.
I love my Lexus.
I love to drive.
I love football.
I love my country (right or wrong!)
AND it also means Zero in tennis, badminton and some other games!
Get the drift?
Just carefully listen to ordinary chit chats, even if it is unobtrusive overhearing in a coffee shop, and you will realize that the word ‘love’ as a noun or a verb is used with reckless abandon. I suppose that reckless abandon and the word are inseparable.
The other common use nowadays is to end all telephone calls/conversations with “Love you” or “I love you too”. I suppose that it is acceptable between spouses, parents and children, siblings etc. I also suppose that these relationships really need that kind of reinforcement in these days of insecurity.
I personally find it extremely difficult to use the word love casually. I find that I am not alone in this peculiar reluctance. Not that I am incapable of that emotion, but to articulate is difficult.
There are other words that can do the job of describing the emotion with more accuracy. Fond of, like, appreciate, crave, attached, long for etc. Somehow I do not find these being in regular use nowadays. Is it a matter of simplifying the language to use one word to express different levels of intensity of an emotion, or is it just a general devaluation of the emotion itself? I find it difficult to answer that question and seek answers from my readers.
The Aquarian Gospel defines it as: “Love is the power of God that binds two souls and makes them one; there is no power on earth that can dissolve that bond.” Does this mean that the increasing incidences of divorces, breaking of family relationships etc would indicate absence of love to start with? Has materialism invaded emotional life as well? Has the time then come for us to accept that by and large, our relationships now, are based on convenience and not on Love?
Finally, a wonderful quote from an Icon.
“I am certainly not an authority on love because there are no authorities on love, just those who’ve had luck with it, and those who haven’t.” – Bill Cosby.