The less able fathers infuse a lot of dysfunctionality into the relationship and sons waste no time in contributing to that. But I guess whatever it is we owe a certain responsibility at all times. I am curious to know what your own son has to say about this topic

Parent-child relationships are so complex at every stage of life. I learned that “honoring your mother and your father” does not necessarily equate with loving them. Luckily, I got to do both, but realize not everyone has that experience. I am in awe of those who can be caregivers for their Golden Oldies even when they haven't had a loving relationship all along. It must make it that much harder to be a caregiver under such circumstances. My hat is off to you, dear friend! I, too, would love to hear your son's perspective on this. Of course, a grandparent and grandchild relationship is very special, and different than parent child from what I've heard. I'm looking forward to that phase of life for sure!

Welcome home!

There are times when words are not necessary. Just knowing that someone who cares is by your side when you open your eyes is enough.

I had a serene & wonderful childhood with my parents & 3 siblings. But after she died I blamed my shortcomings on the way I was raised. She was in pain surely (though not complaining) so I was relieved when she died. I didn't cry even though I cry easily. I cried lots, years later when I really missed her. She wrote long letters every week. She died in 1982 & I miss her more each year.

We all see things from our own perspective. I am sure that if my five siblings and I wrote about our upbringing at home with our parents who remained together for 40 years despite long spells of “Tell your daddy his dinner is on the table!” (read marital silence), the tales would be very different. My only sister the baby of the family, remained with my mother for the 15 years between the deaths of my parents, she knows little about the early life of the family.

@Jean – I love that story.