Archive for October, 2009

Weather And Emotions.

Friday, October 30th, 2009

This post is the Loose Consortium Bloggers’ Friday post when Ashok, Conrad, Grannymar, Magpie11, Marianna, Maria, Gaelikaa, Helen, Judy , and I write one post each on the same topic. Please visit the other blogs too to have different views on this fascinating subject.

francine

India has three major weather seasons and one in between. The winter, the summer, the monsoon and the post monsoon. The Indian calendar clearly follows the climate pattern. Unlike the Gregorian calendar, which has four seasons, Indian calendar has six seasons. Each season consists of two months (Ritus). Instead of complicating matters, let us just say, that the four seasons of the Gregorian calendar has been sub divided to be more relevant to the Indian climate. The Indian calendar is followed for agricultural and religious purposes and is considered to be very accurate for such end uses.

Now, when a nation has six seasons, or rather six subtly different from each other different weather conditions, can its people afford to allow the weather to dictate their emotions? So, Indians have been brain washed to be stoic about weather. In fact, they are taught from childhood to be stoic about every thing. So, the concept of weather affecting emotions does not seem to be applicable to us.

Our ex rulers, the British, were and continue to obsess about weather. It is their favourite topic of conversation. We Indians picked up that particular trait from them and do discuss the weather at every possible opportunity, usually to complain.

The British called the monsoon, gloomy weather, but the Indian longs and prays for copious rains. When it comes, he dances with joy. Some major religious festivals and self purification processes like fasting are undertaken during the monsoon so that idle brains, shut indoors, do not get up to mischief. Towards the end of the monsoon, the major festivals of Ganesh, Navarathri and Diwali are finished and done with so that he can concentrate on the major agriculatural season that would start and get over by around February/March of the following year.

The summer was treated as the least desirable of all the seasons by the British, who tended to move to the cooler climes of our hill stations during the summer. The Indian on the other hand, welcomes the summer because he is free from agricultural duties, and can concentrate on his religious duties, get his offspring married off and undertake repairs and maintenance of his property etc.

During the winter, which is really cold only in the northern most part of India, it is not of the type that the West is used to. Life goes on, albeit with more clothes worn, but nothing like getting snowed in takes place, except in the Himalayas.

That leaves a tiny bit of post monsoon, pre winter couple of months, which coincided with Autumn or Fall in the West. Nothing melancholy happens. This is the time of serious agricultural operations and match making for the winter marriage season.

What I have stated above is for the vast majority of Indians who live in rural India and are dependent on agriculture and other rural occupations. The minority who live in urban India, are not as affected by the seasons but do observe the same festivals and rituals that the rural Indian does based on the Indian calendar.

Not that the Indian is sans emotions. He can experience and demonstrate all the range of emotions that humans are capable of. He simply does not let weather have any thing to do with them. In fact, on a day to day basis, he can experience and demonstrate all the emotions one after the other, depending on that day’s circumstances.

There are two rules for living in harmony. #1) Don’t sweat the small stuff, and #2) It’s all small stuff.
- Wayne Dyer,

The Indian lives by and large in harmony and sweats copiously throughout the year. Yes, despite having been taught by my English teacher that horses sweat, people perspire, I am inclined to go with Wayne Dyer on this.

sweating

“In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.”
- Albert Camus

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Being A Woman – II

Thursday, October 29th, 2009

Since writing my post “Is Being A Woman All That Difficult?” another very interesting article, this time by Ruth Marcus in the Washington Post has appeared which too is worth reading. Ruth’s comment about President Obama had me laughing for quite some time.

In the meanwhile, some comments, wondering whether men can be made to undergo some of the problems that women do have appeared in my blog and Suzen’s comment – “The conversation here is so spirited I’ve nearly forgotten what the post was about! Oh yes, is woman’s life really that difficult? Welllllll, first of all I think if men had to give birth, breast feed, and raise kids there would be no population problem. I’ve frankly never understood why women think having children defines them. I’d like to give this option up to men and see how well they could handle this whole thing —- if I were God and could switch it up a bit. :)

secondly, I recommend Raine Eisler’s Book “The Chalice and The Blade” for a fabulous look at the cultural evolution of the matriarchy/patriarchy – it is stunning.” elicited Conrad’s comment -”suzen brought tears to my eyes!”

mn_junior

I think that it deserves a bit of lightening up of the mood and the following story should do it very well.

A man, sick and tired of work everyday, asked God to switch bodies with his wife.

The next morning, he woke up as a woman… cooked, fed the family, drove to school, washed and ironed, went out for groceries, balanced the checkbook, vacuumed, dusted and swept, cooked dinner… after supper cleaned the kitchen. At night made love to the husband.

The next morning, he admitted his mistake to God and prayed for a trade back. God said, “O.K. But you’ll have to wait for nine months. You got pregnant last night!” :P

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The Joy And The Punishment.

Tuesday, October 27th, 2009


The joy:

Now, the punishment if this guy got caught driving in this condition in Singapore.

The second clip is an amazing video which was sent to me by my brother Barath. This shows what the Singapore Police do for first time offenders charged with driving while drunk. I doubt that the punished will ever want to repeat the offense.

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Is Being A Woman All That Difficult?

Sunday, October 25th, 2009

Many readers of this blog are women and also from the West. Recently some intriguing oped pieces have been appearing in many publications, including venerable ones like the Readers Digest on some of the problems faced by women, even today.

Just a random collection from one such publication, the New York Times, of three articles illustrate what I mean. While one is from a man’s perceptive, the other two are from women and so more the interesting.

Recently, I have been reading Gaelikaa’s blogs and find some issues faced by a Western woman married to an Indian, living in India, but her problems and joys are different from those that these articles present.

I have written about some of the problems and prospects of the modern and not so modern Indian women in India and find that there are a lot of commonalities, just as I find commonalities in the problems and prospects of men in India with men in the West. While the Indian women are not getting the press that the Western ones are, the problems remain the same.

And to give some icing on the cake for my readers, here is something special about another famous lady, admired and decried and at a point of time, even pitied for her husband’s peccadilloes.

It will be interesting to hear from my Western readers what they think about the articles linked here. Please feel free to comment. Thank you.

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Heroism – II

Saturday, October 24th, 2009

I refer my readers to my post “The Complicated Me?”

The book that triggered off that post, is “The Denial Of Death” by Ernest Becker. The book arrived today and I regret that it did not arrive yesterday.

The book is about Heroism. I have just read through the preface and the introduction and have offered the book for first read to my friend who will collect it tomorrow morning. In the meanwhile, this is what Wikipedia has to say about it.

“The Denial of Death is a work of psychology and philosophy written by Ernest Becker and published in 1973.[1] It was awarded the Pulitzer prize for general non-fiction in 1974, two months after the author’s death.[2] The book builds largely on the works of Søren Kierkegaard, Sigmund Freud, and one of Freud’s colleagues, Otto Rank.

The basic premise of The Denial of Death is that human civilization is ultimately an elaborate, symbolic defense mechanism against the knowledge of our mortality, which in turn acts as the emotional and intellectual response to our basic survival mechanism. Becker argues that a basic duality in human life exists between the physical world of objects and a symbolic world of human meaning. Thus, since man has a dualistic nature consisting of a physical self and a symbolic self, man is able to transcend the dilemma of mortality through heroism, a concept involving his symbolic half. By embarking on what Becker refers to as an “immortality project” (or causa sui), in which he creates or becomes part of something which he feels will last forever, man feels he has “become” heroic and, henceforth, part of something eternal; something that will never die, compared to his physical body that will die one day. This, in turn, gives man the feeling that his life has meaning; a purpose; significance in the grand scheme of things.”

There is much more on the subject and you can learn a great deal more about Heroism in the write up. If you think that it would be of further use, perhaps you can read the whole book. I intend to after my friend returns it to me.

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Himalayan Retreat.

Saturday, October 24th, 2009

My young friend Sandeep has written this guest post for the benefit of those readers who had commented on the post about my eventually migrating to Sandeep’s resort and becoming the resident Swami.

stock-photo-swami-meditating-34231876

Without much ado, here is his guest post.

“One of my life’s ambitions (if I live long enough and save enough money) is to own and run a small Himalayan resort.

Here is the website of one of the new breed of Himalayan resorts for the adventurous. This is a luxury resort high up in the mountains that offers solitude, great views, clean and hygienic food and most importantly, hot showers and clean toilets. It caters to rich Indian and Western tourists, looking for scenic treks, “village walks” and home comforts.

One of the hotel sites operated by these guys has been listed in the “Hot List” of Conde Nast Traveler magazine for 2008.

Go to the section in the site titled “Shakti experiences” and check out the photos there. Then check out the photos in the Photo Gallery to get a glimpse of the natural beauty on offer.”

If Sandeep’s resort is anything like what these guys offer, I may just decide to become a resident rather than a Swami in a corner hut. Provided of course, before Sandeep builds the place, I win the Irish Sweepstakes. Grannymar, do they still have that running? Where can I get a few tickets?

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Heroes.

Friday, October 23rd, 2009

This post is the Loose Consortium Bloggers’ Friday post when Ashok, Conrad, Grannymar, Magpie11, Marianna, Maria, Gaelikaa, Helen, Judy , and I write one post each on the same topic. Please visit the other blogs too to have different views on this fascinating subject.

My earliest memory of Hero worship was of an actor named Ranjan. He starred as a villain in Chandralekha, I now understand, when I was around six years old, one of Tamil Film Industry’s all time greats and subsequently, as one of the brothers in the Tamil film, Apoorva Sakotharkal. I was too young to be impressed by his histrionics, but why he was my hero was because he was our neighbour. He used to indulge us youngsters with a smile and a wave as he elegantly got into his open top MG Sports car and drove away. On other occasions, we would catch him in his checked lungi and kurta in his compound quite nonchalant about his star status, ever ready with a smile and a wave for us. My class mates would not believe that he was our neighbour and I had to take them to show them that he really was. Is it a wonder that our son is named Ranjan? Luckily, Urmeela’s father’s name was Niranjan and it was a simple matter to persuade Urmeela to accept the shorter version for our son!

Sadly, I grew up and Ranjan moved on. My next object of hero worship was Johny Weismuller as Tarzan. I was then living with my uncle and aunt as an experiment for a year while my parents and siblings were away at Mumbai. In the campus where we lived, movies used to be shown once a week and Tarzan was a regular hit with boys of my age and perhaps even older. The campus also had a number of banyan trees with the roots climbing down from the branches, enabling some of us to do the Tarzan swing between branches, falling and getting hurt. But the best part of it was the Tarzan yell, we thought would get us face to face with the bad guys.

Other heroes came into my life, all from the reel world and none from the real world. At various times, different heroes were objects of my worship, like Elvis Presley, Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin from the English screen and many Indians like Sivaji Ganesan, Dev Anand, etc. Other fictional heroes like Robin Hood, Mickey Spillane’s Mike Hammer, Perry Mason, Ayn Rand’s Howard Roarke and so many others who gave me hope that mankind can produce heroes and may be I too can become one!

In the meanwhile life was passing by and I was growing up. My first real life hero came into my life only to lose his, to insurgents in the North Eastern part of India in an ambush. He was my classmate and fellow member of the boxing team who joined the Indian Army, rose to the rank of Captain in the Gurkha Regiment and was killed in action. At that time I was already into my working life and had little time for hero worship of the film world.

I also had newer interests and hero worship was not part of that agenda. The agenda was for me to become a hero to others. Whether I succeeded in that attempt is not for me to say, but the truth is that, that was my aim anyway. Some of my friends on the other hand have been convinced since those days and remain so till date, that I am eminently qualified to be a zero.

I grew up as we all do and value systems and definition of heroes changed. I started to notice that the world was full of heroes about who we do not know as they simply keep doing things that make them eligible to be called heroes without ever being conscious of that, nor being acknowledged as such. Ordinary people doing extraordinary things. Let me give some examples.

Among those I consider to be very close friends are two individuals who, in other situations would have been sainted!

The first is a lady, let us call her VW. (Yes, I occasionally call her Beetle and she still does not know why.) She is married to a man who must be the world’s most difficult person to live with. Let me clarify. He too is my friend and I have his permission to say this about him. His life has been like a yo-yo with a great deal of downs and a few ups. They are blessed with two lovely children, a son and a daughter. The younger one, the daughter is an American citizen with two lovely children in American colleges. The son is mentally challenged and has a body of a middle aged man and the mind of a teenager. VW’s husband, CW does not accept this and strongly believes that it is just a character defect. CW has had many health problems and has been semi invalid the last few years, and VW has become care giver to the two men in her life. She has recently undergone treatment for cancer and has had to put up with the side effects of that treatment as well manage the household. To see her, you would not know that this is her internal reality and quite how she manages all that is something that very few people know and I am one of the very few who do. No film life hero or heroine can come anywhere near portraying what VW does to me to inspire me with awe, admiration and the respect that her character fully deserves.

The other is KD about who I have written earlier and who recently provoked me into posting about my own inarticulate angst. KD too is an amazing man for his heroism, which is not recognized for what it is by most people. He is a bright Indian Civil Service man whose career has been stuck at middle rung because he is afflicted with Multiple Scelorosis. His wife has left him and because of some problems created by her, his career has been further affected as well as his having to be involved in many legal complications. Despite these obstacles and problems, he is successfully bringing up his children and is a loving and caring father to them. He has not let his handicaps affect his character and zest for life and is an inspiration for me.

I am sure that all my readers will have such heroes in their lives too. I shall however briefly talk about two more who, despite all odds have succeeded in their own ways in a highly competitive environment by sheer determination and grit.

The first is our newspaper vendor. When we bought our present home twenty years ago, Sanjay was an office boy in a builder’s establishment. We bought our home from the same builder and discovered that the office boy was also our news paper delivery boy. The neighbourhood was still sparsely populated and Sanjay would drop all the newspapers early in the morning and attend to his official work also from morning till evening. As the population increased, so did Sanjay’s business, and today, he employs a few other young lads to do the physical distribution. He has quit his job and is a successful entrepreneur with his own fleet of school buses and vehicles besides his newspaper distribution agency. He has enabled his whole family to come out of poverty and today is a respected member of the community and chances are that he will get involved in local politics too. If he does, I will canvass for him.

The next is another slogger from the backwoods of Uttar Pradesh. He is our bread delivery man and I wrote about him in one of my earliest posts. A cheerful and hardworking man, deeply religious and pious, a role model if ever for the kind of entrereneurs who form India’s unsung economic backbone which does not reflect in our GDP. He is a Muslim but even in during Ramzaan, when he observes the traditonal, not the modern, fast, but rides his bicycle delivery van and without fail delivers various types of bread to his regular customers. He is educating his children so that they can climb out of the life style that he has chosen and hopes that the boys would do well. That is his sole ambition in life.

There are more such people in my life who I admire and respect. Women and men who despite great odds do heroic things without being known to be heroes. There are some who do not get their recognition like Dean Kamen whose invention can revolutionize health in developing countries. There are others like our own Elly, quietly bossing her mother around but making her mother so proud. Like Looney who pushes himself to achieve great feats etc.

On the other hand, we also have wannabe heroes like the Heenes family who took quite a lot of folks for a merry chase with their caper!

And we have other heroes who wish to leave their footprints on the sands of Indian time with pithy slogans on their vehicles like this one on our Delhi Roads.
nobody is virgin

I believe that the world is full of heroes. I can write a book of perhaps fifty chapters, each about a person, at least in my eyes a hero. We can find them if we look hard enough.

Book Lovers Unite.

Friday, October 23rd, 2009

A dear friend, after reading my post on my collecting books could not resist the temptation to send me this message.

“Confucius say….

If you can’t find the book you want You’re probably shopping at the
wrong shop.”

To illustrate, I was also sent this photograph along with the message.
bookstore

I am now determined to find where exactly this book store is located and visit it.

Looney, do you think that it is somewhere in your neighborhood facing closure as many Chinese eateries there seem to be doing?

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Man Descended From Monkey.

Wednesday, October 21st, 2009

This post is likely to raise some shackles. If proof is needed that man descended from monkey, India can now offer such proof. Just have a look at this video and you will be convinced like no evolutionist will ever be able to convince you.

In case you are unable to access the video directly, please use this URL http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cm91hh9SqXs to.

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Obsession With Asian Women.

Wednesday, October 21st, 2009

I just love the ‘Independent’. It gives me great inspiration to write about topics that I normally would not consider writing about.

Just read this wonderful bit from a reader to Indy’s Agony Aunt, Virginia Ironsides. Firstly, her name has now metamorphosed into Virgina and I wonder if Indy will gradually change it into some thing more appealing!

Incidentally, a dilemma that I face for which perhaps VI may have answers to is the fact that when people talk about Asians, most talk about the people from East of India and Bangladesh. That excludes a great deal of humanity. I wonder if the whiner meant that he is obsessed with all Asian women or only the popular variety.

Obviously, this guy did not know that an Agony Uncle blogs regularly and will be very happy to oblige with advise. To start with, had this guy approached me, I would have said, “What the hell man, I do the same too! Except that I do not restrict it to Asian women.”

Virginia’s response and the comments make for some very entertaining reading and I hope that my readers will find it as amusing as I found it.

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