Equations.
By Rummuser. Filed in Humor |Tags: Happiness, Marriage, Old Age, Relations
I received this mail from a ‘well wisher’ who thinks that I should live happily ever after!
Equations!- This is the best I have read in a LONG time
Equation 1
Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy
Donkey= eat + sleep
Therefore:
Human = Donkey + Work + enjoy
Therefore:
Human-enjoy = Donkey + Work
In other words,
A Human that doesn’t know how to enjoy = Donkey that works.
+++++++++++++++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ ++
Equation 2
Man = eat + sleep + earn money
Donkey= eat + sleep
Therefore:
Man = Donkey + earn money
Therefore:
Man-earn money = Donkey
In other words
Man who doesn’t earn money = Donkey
++++++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++
Equation 3
Woman= eat + sleep + spend
Donkey= eat + sleep
Therefore:
Woman = Donkey + spend
Woman – spend = Donkey
In other words, Woman who doesn’t spend = Donkey
++++++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++
To Conclude: From Equation 2 and Equation 3
Man who doesn’t earn money = Woman who doesn’t spend
So Man earns money not to let woman become a donkey!
And a woman spends not to let the man become a donkey!
So, We have: Man + Woman = Donkey + earn money + Donkey + Spend money
Therefore
from postulates 1 and 2, we can conclude
Man + Woman = 2 Donkeys that live happily together!
LIVE LIFE HAPPiLY !! Ho Ho !!!!
Tuesday, November 24th 2009 at 11:20 |
Suggested correction for Equation 3:
woman = eat + sleep + spend + nag
Some other quantities might prove interesting, like the integral of spend from t=beginning of marriage to t=now.
Ursula Reply:
November 24th, 2009 at 16:05
Looney, this is one those moments when one rather regrets two things: Firstly – by virtue of gender – being lumped in with the rest of recklessly spending nags; secondly that certain branches of maths have a way of destabilizing one’s innate confidence into self.
I don’t want to be pedantic (though I am) but are you sure you can have two separate ts as an integral without differentiation?
U
Looney Reply:
November 24th, 2009 at 20:37
There aren’t two different t’s, but rather these are the limits on t for the definite integral. You are correct that I didn’t specify the differential of time in the integral which I had assumed, but wasn’t precise about.
There is also some other variables like “sloth” and “insensitivity” which could be lumped in with the men.
Rummuser Reply:
November 26th, 2009 at 18:05
You have lost me there Looney! My days of maths were over 42 years ago! After that, I left them to the minions.
Rummuser Reply:
November 26th, 2009 at 18:06
Good Lord, I did not know that you can take on someone like Looney!
Looney Reply:
November 26th, 2009 at 21:21
I was hoping that Jean would join in and explain how all this derives from a grand unified theory of physics.
Rummuser Reply:
November 26th, 2009 at 23:43
With that enticing invitation, I am sure that she will.
Rummuser Reply:
November 26th, 2009 at 18:07
Having already read Ursula’s reply, shall leave you to read hers!
Tuesday, November 24th 2009 at 17:21 |
So what are they talking about in the picture?? I forget!
As for all the rest… I am a right old ass.
Rummuser Reply:
November 26th, 2009 at 18:05
Ditto Grannymar, ditto.
Tuesday, November 24th 2009 at 20:42 |
Looney= in the dog house if his wife reads this.
Tuesday, November 24th 2009 at 22:43 |
It takes a twisted mind to understand this twisted post.
Tuesday, November 24th 2009 at 23:10 |
Ha Ha! When I saw the title of your post I thought it was going to be about Mathematics and I almost skipped it. (Not my forte).
I’m with the cartoon lady; what are sexual relations? I don’t have any to send cards to.
Rummuser Reply:
November 26th, 2009 at 18:03
I wish I knew too! I would then send cards.
Wednesday, November 25th 2009 at 00:33 |
Interesting! I will not worry anymore about “somebody’s” spending, I will understand she is avoiding becoming a donkey.Ha!ha!
Wednesday, November 25th 2009 at 09:02 |
I think the comments are as good as the post! Both were very enjoyable. Enjoyable=laugh=very funny! Ever thought of the braying of a donkey is his way of laughing at the humans he observes? Think about that braying sound..don’t you think it sounds like laughter?
Rummuser Reply:
November 26th, 2009 at 18:02
Absolutely. In fact I know someone who sounds just like an ass braying when he laughs.
Wednesday, November 25th 2009 at 17:36 |
What’s up with my “ass”, I saw it in my neighbors field!
BHB, this post is ‘ASSinine!
Rummuser Reply:
November 26th, 2009 at 18:00
I am really looking forward to the day that I can visit you and your neighbour.
Thursday, November 26th 2009 at 10:27 |
Well, I’ve never been much good at equations……..
Thursday, November 26th 2009 at 12:04 |
Really have fun to read this and hats off to such a great humor in mathematics and real world facts.